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Thread: Family and Parenting

  1. #91 The Myth of the Digital Gene — by Mary Rothschild 
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    "I first heard this term “the digital gene” a few years ago. This woman from the children’s media industry said, quite offhand “Well, kids are born with a digital gene now.” It really took me aback.

    My interest is in children from birth, actually pre-birth, to age six and to see this of their lives was shocking. What I’ve seen is that this term “the digital gene” is part of a larger narrative, a media-centered narrative , a mythology if you will, that goes like this: children are born with a digital gene, they are digital natives. We have to prepare them for a digital world, a digital future in a digital landscape. Therefore, it is assumed that they will have digital media from the very beginning. They might even need to have digital media from the very beginning."

    Mary suggests this...

    "So, the faculty that we all need and that we need to help children develop to navigate that future to take advantage of all learning, no matter what form it takes, is attention."

    This is an important and valuable speech. The DailyGood link below has a transcript in addition to the embedded video.

    The Myth of the Digital Gene — by Mary Rothschild

    http://www.dailygood.org/story/1832/...ry-rothschild/

    Here is the video...





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  2. #92 Love and reason: how should we raise our children? — by Harry Hendrick 
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    "As the 2017 ‘Good Childhood’ report and several other surveys reveal, large numbers of children in the UK and the US are anxious, depressed and fearful, and the scope of their unease seems to be broadening.

    Parenting styles are only one of many factors at work in producing this situation, and assessing the costs and benefits of different child-rearing patterns on personal, social and political change is controversial. But there is a substantial body of research in psychology, psychoanalysis, neuroscience and attachment theory that shows that—while genetic endowment interacts with the environment—the emergence and progress of personhood is very much conditioned by the quality of attachment in one’s early life, whether secure or insecure."


    In this very intelligent discussion Harry procedes to provide a historical background on various philosophies of child rearing encountered in the last fifty years or so before concluding...

    "Virtuous parental care for children is better compared to gardening: providing the child with a safe and secure environment in which a variety of flowers, shrubs and trees will bloom. In the garden, the child creates an untold number of futures, each unavoidably unpredictable. Furthermore, just as the good gardener works with and through trust in Nature, so good parents do likewise with their children. After all, without trust we are mere cynics."

    Love and reason: how should we raise our children?
    — by Harry Hendrick

    https://www.opendemocracy.net/transf...e-our-children


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  3. #93 Psychologists’ Advice: Never Say These 5 Phrases to Your Children 
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    "Everything we say and do have an impact on our children. According to psychologists, our word and deeds may affect our children’s adulthood. But, do you know why is that so? Children are like sponges; they receive everything.

    Their brains are still in development, and they have excess synapses at a rate of about 15,000 synapses a neuron which twice more than adults’ brains.

    The things in the environment we are exposed to many times are reinforced in the brain by a lot of neural links to those things. As our parents are the ones, we are mostly exposed to while we are growing up, the way they talk and treat us have a huge impact on us.

    In other words, the way our parents talk to us is how we talk to ourselves. If our parents were giving is support and courage, we would do the same to ourselves. And, if they were critical or angry toward us, we would be so hard on ourselves. Why is this important?

    The manner in which we talk to ourselves has an influence on our self-confidence, as well as our approach to the life’s mistakes, and how we get over them. That is the reason why every parent should have patience with their children."

    I'm usually skeptical about 'Psychologists' Advice' articles but this one contains some good suggestions. It is sort of mindful parenting.

    Psychologists’ Advice: Never Say These 5 Phrases to Your Children
    — by Healthy & Tasty Recipes

    http://healthyandtastyrecipes.com/ps...ases-children/


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  4. #94 Parenting is... — author unknown (from I Can Has Cheezburger) 
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  5. #95 10 Keys to Raise Spiritually Strong Children — by Frank M. Wanderer PhD 
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    "In our life most of us have experienced one or two mysterious encounters, when visitors come to us from the unknown. These special guests are in fact our own children. We love them, and we are happy that they are here, but most of us do not accept them the way we should. They do not receive from us the deep respect and awe that wanderers who come from the depths of the Universe duly deserve. Instead, we look upon our children as if they were our own property, and we try to condition them to become adults we will be able to be proud of. Are we really good hosts for these visitors, is this really the way we should receive our guests?

    Here are 10 keys to raise spiritually strong children..."


    These are actually quite real... not fluff.

    10 Keys to Raise Spiritually Strong Children — by Frank M. Wanderer PhD

    http://powerofconsciousness.blogspot...ly-strong.html



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  6. #96 How to Raise an Emotionally Intelligent Child — by Dr. Laura Markham 
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    "Most parents take their job as teachers very seriously. We teach our kids colors. ABCs. Taking turns. Right from wrong.

    But sometimes we don’t even notice a much more important lesson we’re imparting to our children: how to manage their feelings, and therefore their behavior. This is the basis of emotional intelligence (EQ), which will determine their quality of life much more fundamentally than their IQ.

    Kids learn how to manage “big feelings” when we:

    1 Stay calm and kind in the face of their upset.

    2 Accept their feelings even while we limit their actions.
    3 Respond to their anger with compassion, so they can show us the tears and fears behind their anger."

    Dr. Laura continues with a reminder of the importance of unconditional love...

    How to Raise an Emotionally Intelligent Child — by Dr. Laura Markham

    http://www.positivelypositive.com/20...lligent-child/


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  7. #97 Five Ways to Raise a Grateful Child — by Andrea Hussong 
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    "Would you like to raise a thankful child?

    If so, you’re not alone. Parents’ desires to raise children who are happy, healthy, and, yes, grateful are documented in countless website postings, TED talks, and parenting guides. Indeed, family specialists predating the modern-day parenting movement acknowledge gratitude as among the traits of a healthy family.


    But how? Children may express gratitude regardless of whether they deeply experience it. They may learn to say thank you or show appreciation without the underlying experience of gratitude or, as one six-year-old girl in our studies said, “They may say it, but they don’t mean it.” Although this may help children meet social expectations, they may miss out on documented benefits of gratitude down the road for building stronger social relationships, improving life satisfaction, and enhancing psychological well-being and overall health.

    Gratitude is more than behavior—it is also an internal experience."


    That is just part of the opening thoughts. Andrea goes on to enumerate strategies to use in trying to encourage gratitude in your children.

    Five Ways to Raise a Grateful Child — by Andrea Hussong

    https://greatergood.berkeley.edu/art...grateful_child


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  8. #98 What Parents Neglect to Teach about Gratitude — by Andrea Hussong 
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    "Research suggests that the experience of gratitude has four parts, but we rarely teach all of them to our kids."

    This article was written before "Five Ways to Raise a Grateful Child — by Andrea Hussong" found above. The four parts Andrea discusses are.

    • What we NOTICE in our lives for which we can be grateful
    • How we THINK about why we have been given those things
    • How we FEEL about the things we have been given
    • What we DO to express appreciation in turn

    What Parents Neglect to Teach about Gratitude — by Andrea Hussong

    https://greatergood.berkeley.edu/art...bout_gratitude


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  9. #99 5 Lessons on Parenting from the Animal Kingdom — by*Jessie Klassen 
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    "Nature has lessons for those who listen, and for those who observe with sincerity and open hearts.

    Growing up on a farm, I was afforded the opportunity of having a close relationship with animals. Over my years of living my life this way, there have been many lessons that I have been taught. And as a mother myself, I have paid special attention to the animal mothers, and the way that they parent their babies.

    Here are 5 parenting lessons that I have learned from the Animal Kingdom.

    Lesson #1: “Model the behaviour you would like to see in your child”
    Lesson #2: “Discipline is Necessary”
    Lesson #3: “Be playful”
    Lesson #4: “You are the primary influence”
    Lesson #5: “We would kill and die for our young”

    Each of those lessons is discussed at length.

    5 Lessons on Parenting from the Animal Kingdom — by Jessie Klassen

    https://wakeup-world.com/2017/11/22/...nimal-kingdom/


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  10. #100 How to Use Peaceful Parenting — by Dr. Laura Markham 
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    “One generation full of deeply loving parents would change the brain of the next generation, and with that, the world.” —Charles Raison

    "Peaceful Parenting has three parts:

    1. The parent commits to regulating his or her own emotions.

    2. The parent prioritizes maintaining and strengthening the parent-child connection, which is the only reason children cooperate.

    3. The parent loves the child unconditionally, rather than using “love withdrawal” or other punishment techniquesto control and manipulate the child with punishment or rewards. Instead, the the parent sees him or herself as a coach, offering the child loving guidance so the child learns to manage emotion, and therefore behavior."


    How to Use Peaceful Parenting — by Dr. Laura Markham

    http://www.positivelypositive.com/20...ful-parenting/



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